Ah, procrastination… it’s a sneaky old thing…
Often confused with a desire to ensure something is absolutely right, procrastination is actually the handbrake of perfectionism. And by handbrake, I don’t mean that it puts perfection on hold. Rather, it plays the role of a handbrake in a perfectionist’s life.
Where procrastination shows up
It shows up under the guise of editing and rewording even the briefest of emails before you send it. In your almost detective-like research for purchasing decisions or travel plans. In the items that sit permanently on your to-do list, months or even years after you first added them.
Why it’s invisible
Procrastination can be hidden behind the scenes. It’s a classic trait of the perfectionist to hide the effort they put in.
You don’t want your boss to realise how long it’s taken to create your recommendations because you’ve been agonising over when to stop researching ideas and commit to a shortlist. They might chastise you for not being more efficient and decisive.
Your friends don’t need to know how much midnight oil you’ve been burning on creating suggestions for your next get together. They think you always know the cool places to go so you don’t want to disappoint them.
Procrastination can be insidious. It builds over time and becomes part of who you are.
You may also feel embarrassed about admitting how much time you take to do certain things.
So, you keep your tendencies to over research, edit and stall hidden. You never discuss this behaviour and thought process. Procrastination becomes an invisible part of who you are.
The anxiety link
Your procrastination may be hidden from view but keeping it that way can create anxiety and stress. Because procrastination naturally adds time to everything. All those delayed decisions. All that time taken up with debating and deliberating. And, perhaps most crucially, all of that time spent overriding your gut instincts.
Have you considered all the extra worry and stress you are inadvertently putting yourself through? It’s no wonder that anxiety can become an outcome of procrastination.
Unfortunately, when the two combine they tend to feed each other. Procrastination feeds anxiety. Anxiety feeds procrastination. The mind becomes busy and this makes the agonising and the decision making harder, adding to the delays.
Then the inner critic starts wading in. Berating you for taking so much time to do everything. Much as you might want to be rational and make quick decisions once this cycle gathers pace, the delays only get more pronounced.
The hidden logic
There’s one element of procrastination which surprised me at first, but I hear again and again from clients. It’s a hidden logic that is like a handbrake within the handbrake. The logic is that if you don’t do something, it means it can’t go wrong.
For example, you may dream of making a different career move. In fact, there’s actually another profession that you’ve dreamt of for years, but you deliberately stop yourself from doing anything about it. You might read about it. But you don’t talk to people about it or research what you could do to make it a reality.
Instead, you sit on your hands and prevent yourself from taking any steps towards it. The dream remains a dream. Because whilst it’s still a dream, it means it can’t go wrong.
The perfectionist’s fear of failure is fuel for procrastination. Because procrastination in their mind reduces the possibility of being exposed and open to comment and criticism. It’s their form of logic.
Be curious about your handbrake
Procrastination can be a hallmark of perfectionism but one that’s often hidden from view.
If you’ve been feeling stuck, or that you aren’t moving forwards in life in the way that you hoped, procrastination might be the handbrake that’s keeping you on hold. You may have been doing it with the best of intentions. It might feel like second nature and part of your detail-orientated approach to situations.
So, next time you find yourself knee deep in research or putting off making a decision, be more curious about why this is happening. Why do you need to have so much detail? Why are you delaying things you would really like to do?
