Overcoming the pressure to be perfect

Do you feel like striving for perfection might actually be holding you back? That rather than being a positive aspect of your character, it adds to your stress and makes it hard to relax?

You’re not alone. Many people seek counselling for perfectionism when the drive to be perfect begins to affect their wellbeing.

Perfectionism can be a double-edged sword. Striving for excellence can lead to great achievements but the relentless pursuit of perfection can also create anxiety, self-doubt and a constant feeling of never being good enough. If you find yourself caught in this cycle, counselling can help you explore and break free from the pressures of perfectionism, allowing you to develop a healthier, more balanced mindset.

Understanding perfectionism

Perfectionism is more than just having high standards. It often involves excessive self-criticism, fear of failure, and difficulty appreciating personal accomplishments. Many perfectionists struggle with:

– Procrastination due to fear of making mistakes

– Harsh self-judgment and feelings of inadequacy

– Avoidance of new challenges to prevent failure

– Constant comparison to others

– Burnout from overworking

– Anxiety and stress linked to performance

– Using food and body image to exert control and feel a sense of worth

Perfectionism often develops early in life due to family expectations, personal experiences or societal pressures. Over time, it can become deeply ingrained, making it difficult to change without support. 

It can serve as a coping mechanism to help you feel safe, but when it is extreme, it may cause more harm than good, restricting your development and wellbeing. Unchecked, perfectionism can lead to burnout, anxiety, depression and obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD).

Breaking free from perfectionism

Reducing the impact of perfectionism doesn’t mean lowering your standards or losing motivation – when managed well, it can be an asset. Instead, it means learning to value yourself beyond your achievements. My goal as a counsellor is to help you embrace imperfection, find joy in progress, and develop a more compassionate relationship with yourself.

If perfectionism is impacting your mental health and daily life, therapy can be a powerful step towards change.

How counselling can help

I provide compassionate and tailored counselling for perfectionism to help you understand and work through the underlying foundations of your perfectionism. 

My counselling approach is tailored to your unique needs, helping you:

– Identify the root causes of your perfectionism

– Develop healthier, more realistic self-expectations

– Learn coping strategies to manage anxiety and self-criticism

– Build self-compassion and a more balanced perspective on success and failure

– Address underlying issues such as depression, low self-esteem or disordered eating patterns

Together, we can develop the support and tools you need to break free from self-doubt and constant pressure, allowing you to live with greater ease, confidence and self-acceptance.

Take the first step

I know it can be difficult a perfectionist to reach out for help – you’re typically used to being self-sufficient and better at helping others before yourself. But giving yourself the time and space to understand what drives your thoughts and behaviours can bring a huge sense of relief and open the door to a more fulfilling life.

Please feel free to get in touch if you have questions or would like to arrange a no obligation consultation. 

I offer  and online video counselling, telephone counselling and face-to-face counselling in Tavistock near the Devon and Cornwall border and in Plymouth.